God Blessed Texas.

So my last post was definitely a downer (jeez, who am I?) but I am in Texas right now so I absolutely can't be down!!!! I came out for my best friend's birthday celebrations and to hit a "reset" button on myself. Everyone out here is chilled, happy, and just livin'- L-I-V-I-N'. The weather is so beautiful I want to scream. This morning I put on a thick long sleeve shirt only to feel warm. It is December 1st and my light jacket was too much for 10am. Austin Is Awesome. Today, we travel out to Utopia for cabin adventures and the watching of the SEC championship (Roll Tide). I've definitely had a bit more to drink out here than I usually do, but everyone is just out to have a good time, all the time. We went to what I call "Asian Room Karaoke," which sounds horribly racist but I don't know how else to describe it. Private room, BYOB, low hourly rate. We sang our little hearts out as really weird Korean images and movies played behind the lyrics. Half of it was in Korean. It was a real riot.

I have to say though, I really miss Aaron. We've got this thing now where we are so used to being around each other. We definitely need each other and I think it's this wounded warrior/caregiver thing that is hard to articulate. I'm aware that on the outside we look like just another needy and co-dependent couple, but I feel like it's a lot more than that. However, this trip was much needed and I'm not crying in the corner. I got sad when we went country two-stepping and I remembered how amazing of a dancer Aaron was before the injury and I just wish I had him to hug and dance on his wheelchair. But I think that's okay and pretty normal, all things considered.

And on that note, I'll leave you with a lyric from a song for every person who has had to transition through the dark: You can't carry it with you if you want to survive. Harder said than done, but I am getting there. Just a bit at a time. One coffee and friend and new experience at a time.