Wednesday, July 11, 2012

We're Alright.

I'd be lying if I said everything was all better but it is getting better. I feel like I left a lot of people in a lurch with my slightly-nutty last post, but the support as been incredible.

We got the Very Important Appointment that was missed rescheduled, we're on track with getting a new wheelchair, my mom has a contact for me to facilitate getting some needs met, Aaron had a great primary care appointment, and hopefully all the referrals are made by next week. I'm going to insist that he participate in a sleep study, which I think should have happened a long time ago. I'm fine with doing things "their" way as long as it works, but when it fails it just tends to burn. I have spent two days running around, talking to people, and trying to iron everything out. Our financial situation is changing rather drastically, too. Some of it makes sense, and some of it is just insulting. My NMA pay is being replaced by BAH, but it's not my pay anymore. I  wonder what happens when non-spouse attendants go through their warrior being assigned here, as opposed to attached. It's as if I'm not worth the expense. Also, finding a living situation that continues to be low-cost for us and include our dog isn't possible. Even though we found a place cheaper than the government contract apartments, anything outside of what is offered is to be paid for out-of-pocket. Like most of the policies and procedures in the military, there's a lot of money spent on contracts and nothing ever wholly makes a ton of sense. I promise to explain it all soon. It's not that it puts us in a dire situation, or that I'm ungrateful for what we have, but it's a lot of added stress to have the income we've received for 10 months reduced by a third in a short amount of time. At least we figured this out a couple of months in advance so we have a little time to practice living on less before the changes take effect. We received a substancial amount in donations, and of course we have the TSGLI (the military price list for compensation for loss of limbs- look it up, you'll either laugh or cry). We are secure, but it's still an adjustment and some of it- say it with me, now- just ain't right.

I'm also sad I haven't been able to take a safety course to get my scooter on base yet. It's such a hassle since nothing is offered here, and the Navy Yard and surrounding bases aren't exactly close.

But we're okay. We're always okay. I have an incredible man and marriage. It just sucks that recovery comes with so much other bullshit. Sometimes it is just too much to process. It's why I have a therapy appointment on Thursday. What I have accepted is that this is an incredibly abnormal environment and therefore, no one can be expected to act normally here. It's easy to judge people who go a little crazy while they're here, but until someone has lived at a hospital in this environment for these reasons a single judgment can't reasonable be made against anyone who at least gets out of bed in the morning. Even though I feel beaten down, I know I'm still thrivin', not just survivin'. Bethesda Tour 2011-???


  1. I'm sorry about the pay stuff- that has to be stressful. I know it always has been for us, and we're in a totally different boat. I looked up that chart, and I understand they "have" to put a price on things to compensate people, but it seems so strange (and low) when I read it.

  2. If pure at Bethesda have you looked at Andrews Air Force base? Not sure if it is close enough buys I thought it was better than the other bases distance wise.

    1. * you're. Not pure. And but not buys. Gosh I can't comment from my phone anymore.