Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Small Talk.

I can't do it. I've always been bad at it. I'd rather scratch a chalkboard with my own nails. I've been listening to myself more and I realize that I tend to talk about interesting things as opposed to the weather. I talk a lot. I can be loud and I'm definitely not scared easily. I do well in groups. But there's a part of me that can be such an introvert. I just don't want to waste time talking to people I won't see again. I don't want anyone to ask me how I'm doing because I want to be honest when I answer. Getting services done are torture. The nail tech: "So, are you from here?" "No." "Okay, where are you from?" "Alabama." "Why are you here?" "Because my husband and I live at the military hospital." "Why?" "He was blown up."

Do you see? I try not to get into it. No one wants to know about rotting flesh, gooey wounds, stitches, twitches, and sleepless nights. No one really needs to know that I am sore from top to bottom because I spent the last weekend lifting a wheelchair in and out of the rental van about 50 times. If small talk was hard for me before, it's nearly impossible now.

I think the real problem is that I just want to be honest. I don't want to waste my breath telling people that everything is fine, oh life's grand, isn't the weather nice, did you read the new bestseller... blah, blah, blah. If I'm not going to be engaging, if the conversation isn't going to be worth having, then I just don't want to bother. At all. Hand in hand, this goes with fluff blog posts. Some are great, but the perfect blog gets old. There are only so many recipes, fashion themes, guest posts, product reviews, and Pinterest posts (dear god, someone stop the Pinterest) out there. It just all becomes empty at some point. I don't care about summer drinks, tell me about your life! I guess I feel the same way about small talk.

Anyone else feel this way?

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4 comments:

  1. H.May 8, 2012 at 11:54 AM

    I agree with u fully! what's the point in having a conversation in which u can't talk about what's important or be honest!

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  2. AnonymousMay 10, 2012 at 2:27 PM

    Many years ago, I was taught that when people ask how you are, they are being polite. They don't really want to know how you are!!! Therefore, I say fine, ask them how they are, and move on. It is a basic communication skill. If you don't want to "small talk" with your nail tech, learn the art of being vague, most people don't want to hear about rotting flesh anyway. Everyone needs boundaries, and it sounds as if you could use a few for yourself.....a little mindless conversation might be a good break from the heavy load you carry.

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  3. AlanaMay 10, 2012 at 11:38 PM

    I totally get this! I'm not a big small-talker myself (mostly because I'm just awkward and tend to blush profusely), but I can't imagine how much more annoying it is for you! And AMEN on the blog thing. I know I've been guilty of it before, which is why I cut back from five posts a week to three. I don't bother reading 90% of the posts in my feed anymore.

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  4. Bougie GirlMay 12, 2012 at 10:32 AM

    I am an extrovert but after my engagement to a Navy man broke up I got tired of explaining how I ended up in a military town. I am moving back to the Midwest in a couple of months so, it should get easier. Hang in there. Sending you good vibes from the Enchanted Seaport.

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